Friday, 28 January 2011

The Imperfections of Life

Life is so rarely perfect that to search for perfection to the extent of neglecting the reality of your life is a foolish pursuit. Things rarely pan out just how we’d want them to. No matter how much you want something to happen, there is every chance you will be powerless to actually make it come about. There is every chance that the thing you least want to happen will come about, instead of the thing you most wish for. You might start something with the best intentions, yet find that without any obvious slip, you have ended up with less than you expected, sometimes less than you began with. If you ever start to feel that everything is starting to come together in your life, something will come along which will spoil it, life will throw something at you that you just couldn’t be prepared for.

This may all sound a bit depressing but I don’t believe it should be. I believe all these statements to be true of life, all these things can happen, and given a little time I could probably name a situation in which each has happened to me, and I’m certain I’m not unique in that respect. However this doesn’t make me feel at all down, for it is the crap that life throws at you that makes you appreciate the good, it is the bad times which elevate the good in your memory. If everything went perfectly well all the time, if we always got what we wanted, then we would be bored and unappreciative.

Deal with what life throws at you, twist it and turn it until you can find the positive, for it is a cliché I know, but the vast majority of situations can have a silver lining, you just have to be inclined to look for it.

Sometimes there are times in our lives where dealing is pretty much impossible, when the obstacles are too great and the tragedies too traumatic. If you find yourself unable to deal, unable to make sense of what is happening and draw anything other than negatives from it, then reset your aims. If you cannot deal then just survive, go from day to day until life seems less hopeless and the darkness recedes. There is no shame in holding your hands up and saying that all you can manage to do is keep going for a while.

Surviving isn’t living, and eventually you have to pull yourself out no matter how much it hurts, for the effort will be rewarded eventually.

Life is rarely if ever perfect, things won’t always turn out how you want, you may have too much or too little of something, whether it be time, possessions or love, but the trick is to accept the imperfection and cherish what you do have, for only then can you truly be happy.

I write this fully aware that far too often i fail to maintain the idealistic and determinedly optimistic viewpoint i've just championed. I've spent far too long over the last few years pursuing the perfect relationship, the perfect friendships, the perfect (for me at least) future career, and I suspect that i've missed out on some great opportunities along the way because of that.

I'm going to try and change that. Fingers crossed eh?

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